Monday
Apr032017

Happy Ollieday!

I still cannot believe our little guy turned ONE this past Saturday! To be quite honest, I was initially tempted to skip the fuss of throwing a birthday bash. However, I eventually realized that surviving the first year is a pretty major milestone, and we certainly didn't make it through alone. Festivities were in order! We ended up having a super low-key brunch party, and it was such a memorable gathering. I'm so glad we had this time to celebrate. After all, who couldn't use a little funfetti in their life? :)

Although it was Oliver's party, this day was also a celebration of our family and friends, near and far. You know who you are :) Chris and I want you to know that your love, generosity, and encouragement have sustained us through some of the craziest highs and lows over this past year. It hasn't always been easy, but your companionship has made this journey much more fruitful and rewarding. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you.

I've been told it just gets crazier, but also a lot more fun. There's lots to look forward to, and it's important that we exercise gratitude and remember to savor each step, big and small. We ask that you continue to pray for us, and to keep us accountable along the way. 

Words cannot describe how tremendously blessed we are to have you as our village! This little boy is so incredibly loved, and we are deeply grateful to be able to share him with you. 

Thursday
Mar302017

Oliver 101

Oliver Huxley Jeng was born as the sun was rising on April 1st, 2016. I can still hear his first wobbly cry. The world just seemed to stop for a moment as he laid there on top of my heart. I was delirious with joy and exhaustion. All I could do was hold him tight.

I'll never forget the first day we brought our baby home... that feeling of excitement and sheer terror. I remember sitting there crying for hours, staring at his tiny face, marveling at each detail, wondering how in the world he could be so beautiful. I was in utter disbelief that I was actually his mama. This tiny human needed me more than anything has ever needed me. There was no turning back.

Navigating the complexities of motherhood has stretched, and at times, broken me. I have never been so consumed with love, worry, and happiness. I'm constantly struggling to wrangle anxieties, relinquish perfectionism, and follow my intuition. It has been an ongoing lesson in relying on God - I've needed His grace, peace, and wisdom more than ever. This season has cultivated a newfound resilience within me. It's perplexing how one can feel this vulnerable, depleted, and empowered all at once.

My heart aches as I watch that little baby steadily ebbing away. Then it soars when I see more of a little boy surfacing with each new day. Every time another facet of Ollie's emerging personality shines through, I am astounded by how much more deeply I am capable of loving him. Riding shotgun for new discoveries, witnessing milestones, and seeing the world through his eyes has humbled, edified, and strengthened me. I wouldn't trade this time together for the world.

People frequently ask, "What's Oliver like?" This sweet little boy. It feels impossible to sum him up with a few simple words. My son is inquisitive, pensive, gentle, and completely obsessed with Wonka. Ollie can be a bit reserved, but the truth is, he's downright silly. Whenever you get a laugh out of him, it's exuberant, it's infectious, and it feels like you've won a million bucks. I constantly wonder how we ever got so lucky.

It's been a wild ride. The views are more breathtaking than I ever could have imagined. And this is just the begining.

{Photo credit: LittleBunnyNomi}

Wednesday
Mar232016

Home Stretch.

We are rapidly approaching the one-week countdown until #miniJengster’s due date! Chris and I have read the books, taken the classes, washed all those tiny little outfits, and packed our bags. Now all there is left to do is wait. 

It’s hard to imagine how drastically our lives are about to transform. Even the simplest details of our daily routine may never be the same. We recently invited the gorgeously talented Kate Thompson over to capture a quiet Saturday afternoon in our home. These photos are a sweet reminder for us to not forget about the little things or take them for granted as our family continues to grow.

A crazy whirlwind of thoughts and emotions has been swirling through my heart and mind. There are so many things I want to say to the people in my life. I guess there is no better time than the present to express these sentiments as we savor these last few peaceful moments at home.


Chris: As we are prepare to celebrate 7 years of marriage next month, I can't imagine finding ourselves in a better place. We've collected an abundance of memories to look back on and treasure, and there is so much to look forward to, right around the corner.

I didn't know what to expect out of pregnancy. Although we hit a few scary and painful patches, this journey has been unexpectedly romantic and it has brought us even closer together. Thank you for being by my side every step of the way. You have championed me through times when I felt weak and discouraged, and have gone above and beyond to keep me pampered and happy.

What a tremendous privilege to be able to experience parenthood together with you. There are going to be days (and nights) when we will be at our wit's end, trying to keep it together and figure things out. Let's continue reminding each other to trust and rejoice in whatever God has in store for us, every single day. Chaos, exhaustion, and stress will be our reality, but so will all the delight, wonder, and bliss we discover along the way.

I cannot wait to see our baby in your arms. What's he going to be like?? Will he have your smile, and my eyes? Your sincerity and humor, my curiosity and imagination? I hope he has your selfless heart. Thinking about all your qualities reminds me just why I married you in the first place. I love you so much. You're going to be an incredible father.


Friends & Family: Many of you have pushed, challenged, and encouraged our personal growth over the years. You have inspired us to strive for our best, and have loved us through our lowest and worst.

The overwhelming love, generosity, and support that you have shown to us has now overflowed to our child, and we are simply blown away. Chris and I are working on connecting with and thanking each of you individually, but for now, please know you have our deepest gratitude for all your prayers, thoughtful gestures, and kind, uplifting words. It means the world to us. Thank you for being our village.


Wonka: Mommy has been feeling pretty sad and worried that you will not take to your new sibling. You seem a bit confused and troubled by the many changes going on around you, yet you have remained a constant comfort and faithful companion through it all.

My hope is that our home will continue to be filled with love, music, and laughter, and you are a great big part of that happy picture. I promise I will make time to snuggle and give you belly rubs, even after a long day. I have a feeling that your little brother is going to adore you. We are going to be just fine, little bear.

MiniJ: As much as you have already rocked our world, I am pretty sure Daddy and I have only the slightest idea of what is actually about to happen. As your arrival draws closer, I am finding myself unable to sleep. I've spent countless waking hours thinking about you and praying for us.

My heart has been changing and growing rapidly along with yours, and it still astonishes me to feel us move through each day together. Despite the pain and discomfort, I have loved being your first home. This experience has rendered me amazed and grateful. There is nothing I wouldn't do for you.

I will miss having you all to myself, but there are so many people who are waiting to meet you! We are truly blessed to be surrounded by a wonderful community that will help us along and cheer us on. It absolutely floors me to think about how much love you will have in your world.

I have never been happier or more excited in my entire life. I cannot wait to kiss you, hold you, and to become your Mama. See you soon, sweetheart :)


We are ready for you, little guy.