Oliver 101
Thursday, March 30, 2017 at 10:31AM 
Oliver Huxley Jeng was born as the sun was rising on April 1st, 2016. I can still hear his first wobbly cry. The world just seemed to stop for a moment as he laid there on top of my heart. I was delirious with joy and exhaustion. All I could do was hold him tight.
I'll never forget the first day we brought our baby home... that feeling of excitement and sheer terror. I remember sitting there crying for hours, staring at his tiny face, marveling at each detail, wondering how in the world he could be so beautiful. I was in utter disbelief that I was actually his mama. This tiny human needed me more than anything has ever needed me. There was no turning back.
Navigating the complexities of motherhood has stretched, and at times, broken me. I have never been so consumed with love, worry, and happiness. I'm constantly struggling to wrangle anxieties, relinquish perfectionism, and follow my intuition. It has been an ongoing lesson in relying on God - I've needed His grace, peace, and wisdom more than ever. This season has cultivated a newfound resilience within me. It's perplexing how one can feel this vulnerable, depleted, and empowered all at once.
My heart aches as I watch that little baby steadily ebbing away. Then it soars when I see more of a little boy surfacing with each new day. Every time another facet of Ollie's emerging personality shines through, I am astounded by how much more deeply I am capable of loving him. Riding shotgun for new discoveries, witnessing milestones, and seeing the world through his eyes has humbled, edified, and strengthened me. I wouldn't trade this time together for the world.
People frequently ask, "What's Oliver like?" This sweet little boy. It feels impossible to sum him up with a few simple words. My son is inquisitive, pensive, gentle, and completely obsessed with Wonka. Ollie can be a bit reserved, but the truth is, he's downright silly. Whenever you get a laugh out of him, it's exuberant, it's infectious, and it feels like you've won a million bucks. I constantly wonder how we ever got so lucky.
It's been a wild ride. The views are more breathtaking than I ever could have imagined. And this is just the begining.
{Photo credit: LittleBunnyNomi}
Reader Comments (2)
oh-lieeeeeee. love you jengs!
Love this! Beautiful photo and beautiful words, Jen. Happy 1st Birthday to Oliver!